Star Trek Zombies

My dreams are always so… weird, complex, vivid, and yet, they’re quite interesting.

Last night (it’s 9am right now, and I just woke up), I dreamt that I was part of the medical team aboard, get this, The USS Enterprise. That’s right. I was aboard the frigging Star Trek spaceship. Now, I am not a Star Trek fan at all, but somehow I managed to get the name of the ship and the characters right. Weird. The captain of the ship was James T. Kirk, but not the William Shatner version. It was the Chris Pine version. Hehehe. Even in my dreams, I have good taste :P And who the hell is Jean-Luc Picard? His name keeps popping up in my head, but I don’t know who he is.

Anyhoo, during the voyage to some place in the outer space (dreams are never very clear about these things), there was an outbreak of zombie virus. Yeah, Star Trek + Zombies, who would have thought right? Anyhoo, one guy got infected and turned into a zombie  and during a huge fight, he was thrown through and glass window and fell into deep space oblivion.

Then we landed on some planet that really looked like Earth, IMO. What did we do? We had a frigging PICNIC! That’s when several other people started showing symptoms of the Zombie virus. I, being a part of the medical team, had to administer some kind of shots to these infected people. It was quite tough. They were starting to get aggressive, and I had to find the right vein to inject the antidote in, and they were chasing me on the water slide… Yeah.. That’s when I woke up. I usually wake up when my dreams start to get wonky :p

I blame SPOCK for this dream!

P.S. Jean-Luc Picard – Bald guy who played Professor X on X-Men. Had to google him. LOL.

P.P.S Maybe I should start a dream blog. Chronicle all my dreams. That’d be cool…

Being Stepped Over?

Langkah Bendul – In the Malay culture, it is considered a “langkah bendul” when a younger sister gets married before her elder sister. It is also tradition for the younger sister and her newlywed husband to present the elder sister with gifts as a sign of respect and hope that the older sister will find her own match soon.

You’re probably wondering why I’ve suddenly decided to give you an insight into the Malay culture. Not only Malay culture, but Malay WEDDING culture at that. Here’s the story…

My younger sister, Ernie, recently announced that she’s going to be bringing home a guy to officially meet the family. A guy whom, if all goes well, she plans on getting engaged to and marrying soon afterwards. A WEDDING! SUCH HAPPY NEWS! I am happy for her, and for a while, all I could think of was “GIFTS! GIFTS! GIFTS!” since a “langkah bendul” will happen.

All was great until I decided to go over to my parents’ house after work  because I’d been too busy this past weekend to stop by. The first thing my mom said to me as soon as I walked in the door was, “Kalau adik kamu kahwin, nanti kamu dilangkah bendul. Kamu takpe?”, which, in English, meant, “When your younger sister gets married, you’ll be stepped over (langkah bendul). You okay with that?” My answer to that was, “Takpe. Biarlah die kahwin. Lagipun nanti Ira dapat hadiah. Heheheh,” which meant, “It’s okay. Let her get married. Besides, I’ll get presents. Hehehe.” You know what my mom’s answer to that was? She said, “Bagus. Biarlah die kahwin. Kalau nak tunggu kamu, sampai bile die nak tunggu,” which meant, “Good. Let her get married. If she has to wait for you to get married first, who knows how long she’ll be waiting.”

GEEEEEEZZZZ MOM!!! Are you on a mission to see the destruction of my mere and humble existence?!

Okay, so it sucks that there’s a high probability that my younger sister who’s 3 years my junior might get married before I do. But if it’s true love, who am I, the most hopeless romantic I know, to stop it? Let true love run its course. I’m genuinely happy that she has found someone worth bringing home to officially meet the family. I really am. But does my mom have to be so condescending and hurtful? I am only 26 years old GODDAMMIT!

Do I annoy you? Really? How much do I annoy you? Am I annoying you now? Are you really annoyed? Will you tell me if you’re annoyed? Will you? Will you? Am I really annoying?

Have you ever met anyone who annoyed you so much that their presence could change your mood from utterly upbeat to horribly horrifying? Someone who, no matter what he did, annoyed the crap out of you?

Unfortunately, I have. Recently, in fact. The funny thing is that I’ve known the guy for about 5 years. Granted, I’ve only known him online all the while before this, but still. I’ve met a lot of people online, and almost all of them have turned out to be decent people. Some of them even became some of my closest friends, like Zuni and Corporate Chick, so it was really weird when this particular guy just bugged the hell out of me. Him online? Decent guy. Got along with him fine. Him in person? Kill me. Kill me now!

This guy, let’s just call him Annoying Man in honor of his superhuman power to annoy me beyond mere annoyance, had SOOOOO many annoying characteristics. Let’s highlight a few of the major ones…

1. His tendency to blurt out random words in French, a language none of my friends, family members, or myself knew. A few foreign words here and there is not a problem since I, myself, am an ESL teacher, but this guy does it ALL THE FRIGGING TIME! It’s the equivalent of me saying this to a person who doesn’t speak Malay: “Yeah, yeah! Let’s go to that place! Tempat tu seronok gile!” People who don’t speak Malay, did you understand what I just said? NO!!!!! And this happened like 5 times a day!!!
2. His ability to talk about money… and nothing else. Zuni commented that Annoying Man seemed to be quiet most of the time… except when he’s talking about money. “We closed a deal with our client for this much money,” “I bought the place for that much money,” and “They’re paying me this much every month,” are the kind of things you hear coming out of Annoying Man’s mouth when he’s not jabbering in French. You know what I think though? I think he was all talk and that he didn’t actually have as much money as he made it seem like he had.
3. His manners… or lack of it.
   He had his shoes on the first time he stepped into my house. I told him off for it and explained the Asian custom of taking off the shoes when you enter a house, coz let’s face it, we Asians do everything on the floor. We sit, eat, pray, and even sleep on the floor. Fast forward to a few days later, he walked around my house with his shoes on AGAIN! Not only that, when I dropped by my parents’ house (my parents were out of town) to drop off my brother, I told him to come inside the living room and use the internet if he wanted to coz I had to get some stuff from the house, he WENT UPSTAIRS UNINVITED! I got so angry! Who the hell goes upstairs in a stranger’s home uninvited?! People with no manners, that’s who!
4. His inability to accept his faults, mistakes, or anything that sheds a negative light on him.
   Sometimes it’s hard to understand what he’s saying because he doesn’t pronounce his “H”. So one day he was saying, “Yeah, you have to eat the batteries. Then it’ll work.” We were all baffled. We were like, “What? Eat the batteries?” It was another 5 minutes before we figured out that he was trying to say “HEAT”. When I tried to get him to pronounce it properly, he said “That’s how we French talk.” So what? IT’S EFFING WRONG! Just frigging admit it already. Gah!
5. More of his annoyingness!
   Last month we went on a 26km cycling tour in Cambodia. He kept falling behind and had on this constantly pissed off face the whole entire bike ride. (Did I mention he had on a constantly pissed off face each and every morning when we’re walking around temples as well?)  His reason? “They gave me a shit bike! This bike is fucked up! I can’t change gears!” …………… SIEM RIEP IS A STRETCH OF FLAT LAND! THERE IS NO NEED TO CHANGE BIKE GEARS!I didn’t change my gear the entire bike ride, AND my bike seat was so hard that within 5 minutes on it my ass was already aching, but did you hear me complain? NO!

You know, this particular guy bugs me SOOOOO much that if I keep going, I’ll have an uber long list. Because of this, I’m gonna stop here. I hope someone can shove his boastfulness, his rudeness, and his annoyingness up his rude, pompous ass!

The Big Potato Blow Out

1. Things you need to know before you read on:
   There is a guy at work who likes to make stupid and gross (albeit funny) sex jokes at work. One day, he did a finger gesture to the girl sitting next to him. The girl’s reaction was a disgusted face and the remark, “Eewww! Gross! You look like a potato!” because in reality, he does have an uncanny resemblance to a potato.
2. The Potato hates me (though he won’t admit it if you ask him) ever since I became close friends with the Sutton. Frankly, I think he’s got some sort of man-friend crush on The Sutton… *shivers*

Now, the story….
I had to make a teacher’s duty roster for Friday’s graduation. The Sutton thought it’d be funny if we added “The Potato” in bracket beside The Potato’s name (his real name, which shall not be mentioned in order to avoid further humiliation to the potato’s part, as well as a means of preventing another possible Big Potato Blow Out).

Anyhoo… The Sutton did it. I warned him that The Potato might get mad, but he thought it’d be funny. Let’s face it, it is kinda funny. So The Sutton made his little change, and I let him print it out.

The next day, The Potato was not happy. He ignored The Sutton. Unfortunately, he didn’t ignore me. He called me over and started shouting his potato ass off to me. Ordering me to change the duty roster. Yelling about how it was inappropriate behavior. Ummm.. I’m sorry, but weren’t you the one who’s always making sexual jokes in the office? What a hypocrite. Oh, wait, that was different? How so? Pfffft!

The Sutton tried telling The Potato that it was all his fault and I wasn’t to blame, but he just yelled at The Sutton to shut up, turned back to me, and kept on yelling and yelling and yelling. The whole office heard and all was quiet. I was quite angry myself. Wanted to smack him in the face. Why only blame me? Why not blame The Sutton and I equally? I’m telling you, it’s the whole I-Hate-You-Coz-You-Took-My-Sutton-Away-From-Me scenario. He just needed a valid reason to hate me.

It was The Big Potato Blow Out. Very messy. Although, doesn’t it make you think about potatoes and barbeques? Mmmm… Yummy :) Hehehe.

Today's Lesson

Today I learned that...

My plumbing goes haywire whenever I'm in The Castle. How cool is that? :)
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11th January 2010

It is only the 11th day of the new year, yet I feel as if these past 11 days have been some of the most eventful days of my life. I don’t know what it is, but I just have a gut feeling that 2010 will be a great year. I feel it in myself. I feel it in the air. I feel it all around me. Heck, it’s only the 11th, yet I feel like I have done so much. It’s invigorating! 2010 is invigorating!

Unfortunately, The Bostonian is gone. It feels weird. He played a vital role in 2010 being a great year for me so far. Meeting him marked the start of the new year. With him gone, well, I feel as if an ending is near.

So… as I was driving to work this morning, I watched as the pink hue of the morning sky brighten up and clearing out to a new day. At that moment, I knew that he was probably getting ready to leave, and with him leaving, he was penning the last words of the first chapter of my new year. My 2010. But hey, that chapter is only the beginning… :)

To a wonderful New Year!

Merry Christmas 2009!

Yu-Yun and I with Chinese Santa at Red Box :)

I know this is like 5 days late, but MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone! Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas, as I surely did. My Christmas weekend was awesome! Recap!

Thurs, 24th Dec

• Christmas potluck party at work where Teacher D dressed up as Santa and we had tons of amazing food! Think lamb lasagna, baked macaroni, trifle etc...
• Christmas Eve Party at my most beloved Venezuelan couple's apartment. Dragged J.Sum and Mustakey along. Again, had tons of food. Croquetas and roast chicken and chicken salad and I can go on and on and on... I had way too much food, so much so that I actually fell asleep during the party. Hail the sleeping queen! It didn't help that Mr. Venezuela kept on poking my nose to wake me up. Oh, and remember that Mr. In-Your-Face who kept pestering me about giving him my number? He was there, but kept his distance. Hehe. I guess he learnt his lesson after all :p
• Left the party around half past midnight. To go where, u ask? CASTLE! Our favorite pastime, smoking shisha :)

Fri, 25th Dec

• Hmmm... My mind's a little hazy as to what we did on Christmas itself... Oh, right! Went shisha again, this time with Lawyer Chick and her Small Big Bro. Called up Killa and Yu-Yun. Was only supposed to be the 5 of us, but a whole lot of other people came. Ended up being a full house with like 12 people. But fun, as always :)
• Christmas Sleepover at Lawyer Chick's abode!

Sat, 26th Dec

• Went to Rock the World Concert at Bukit Jalil. We were there EARLY! Lawyer Chick's friend's band, Kyoto Protocol (heck if I know if they're environmentally conscious or not) was one of the first bands to perform. They were good, though, I have to give them that. Had some awesome HATI BAKAR! Huhuhu.
• Went to watch Cirque de Freak: The Vampire's Assistant. Wasn't a completely bad movie.
• Shisha again afterwards with Mustakey's clan.

Sun, 27th Dec

• Watched Sherlock Holmes. It wasn't bad, but I was sorely disappointed in the fact that I fell asleep during the climax of the movie. I guess they spent too much time on building the suspense that in the end I just got tired of it. LOL.
• Shisha with Mustakey's clan again. This time one of them brought poker chips and we played poker! I won the first round. Of course, we didn't play with real money. Kinda wish we did now. LOL.

So, like I said, busy, busy Christmas weekend. I think I've blogged quite a lot on this LOL. Until New Year's!

P/S My christmas presents: a photo frame, an Edward Cullen T-shirt (which I was slim enough to wear today, and did), a Stila lipstick, a cat mug, and 2 decks of Cognac Copag playing cards. Not a bad haul considering I don't celebrate Christmas :) love you guys!
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I Don’t Want To Give You My Number MEANS I Don’t Want To Give You My Number!

but I don’t drink,
so I’m never drunk :)

I was at a party last weekend and I got hit on by a guy. It wasn’t pleasant or nice or anything of the sort. The guy was the in-your-face type and was coming on slightly too strong. So he asked for my phone number and I said no (he looked like he couldn’t believe I had just said no to him). Then he asked if I wanted HIS phone number, to which I said no… again. You know, you’d think a guy would get the hint (what with being rejected twice in a row) and just move on. But not this guy. He came back a total of two times. The final time I said no to him (as I was leaving the party), he said, and I quote: “How cowardly of you”. Dude, I rejected you NUMEROUS times to YOUR FACE. I’d say I’m ANYTHING but a coward.

Here are some tips for guys when it comes to asking for a girl’s phone number:

1. Make sure the girl’s into you. If she doesn’t seem to be flirting back, MOVE ON!
2. When a girl says she doesn’t want your number, it means just that. She’s not playing hard to get. Trust me.
3. When she says she doesn’t want your number, don’t be stupid by coming back and asking her for her number again. Waiting a few minutes won’t make a difference, unless you can miraculously transform yourself into Gerard Butler (300 version) in that span of time.

P/S Just found out from The Journalist that the last time she was at a party with the aforementioned guy present, he hit on her. Sheeesh, how desperate do you have to be to be hitting on every female in your line of vision?

P/P/S I prefer shy and reserved guys :)

Busy Busy October

Last day of October. I’m gonna miss it. It’s been a great month, albeit all the hectic. Let’s recap October:

1. My first month as a full time instructor at ELS.

2. Got my first full time instructor salary. 
3. Went on my first ELS Trip with students to KLCC Sky Bridge.

4. Turned 25 on the 25th.

5. Weekend road trip to Melaka with amazing friends for my birthday.
 
6. Those three small words.

Didn’t celebrate Halloween. Maybe next year. Will have some good shisha with some students tonight. Happy All Hallow’s Eve everyone! :)

Worst Morning Ever

Why?
1. Didn't get enough sleep and woke up late.
2. Got into a bit off a tiff with the mother which involved her stopping my laundry in the middle of the wash and taking my wet clothes out of the washer just to spite me.
3. Accidentally cut my finger on a razor pretty badly.
4. Tripped over the phone on the way down the stairs.

Note: All this happened before 7am. My life is so amusing.
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Zoo and Crosswords

Yesterday was a very busy day for me. Went to visit MuffinMan at the hospital in the morning. The guy was down with Dengue Fever and did not look like his usual upbeat self. (The horrible fro-like hair didn’t help either :P).

After spending some much-missed time with MuffinMan (and getting some tips from his mom on where to get good Nasi Kerabu), E and I left to go to the Zoo. That’s right. THE ZOO! Entrance fee was RM20 per person, and since I wasn’t smart enough to bring a camera, we had to buy one of those one-time use camera for RM30. Bye bye money. Huhuhu. We saw some pretty cool animals. FYI, I did not know porcupines were huge!

In the car after a fun-filled day at the zoo :)

Later that night, I hung out with Psychedelic Diva. Hung out with her the night before and realized just how much I’ve always enjoyed hanging out with her and how I’ve missed it. She’s the ONLY person from Convent Sentul that I actually keep in touch with in person. We spent last night shisha-ing at Castle, getting high on Mountain Dew and racking our brains over some crossword puzzles. Next on our to-do list is SHOPPING NEXT SATURDAY! Hah! I’m actually excited about a shopping outing!

 
Psychedelic Diva having a psychedelic crosswords moment? :)

Aidilfitri Achievement 2009 – Disappointing!

Ketupat Count: 15

I am sorely disappointed in myself. Only 15 ketupats this year? Man… I’m losing my touch! Hopefully I’ll be able to eat more than 15 ketupats next year. Gambarimasu!

On a different note, the highlight of this year’s Aidilfitri for me was not the food nor the feel of Aidilfitri. It was our (my 2 sisters, my cousin, and I) attempt to take pictures of ourselves jumping in the air… IN BAJU KURUNG! Here are two of the best shots we got:

Note: Can you see my flying shoe? Hee Hee Hee.

This one’s awesome coz our uncle, Pak Ngah, happened to be passing by, and we were like “Come jump with us!” and HE DID! LOL!

Of course, Aidilfitri wouldn’t be Aidilfitri without our tradition of taking silly pictures of ourselves :)

1st day of Aidilfitri…

2nd day of Aidilfitri…

BUT… in reality, we actually do look nice when we’re not making dumb faces :)

Oh, did I mention that we took our cats along with us for balik kampung?

Of course, when you’re in the rural area, cats aren’t the only animal you’re going to encounter…

Centipede… (A dead one. My dad killed it.)

Leech… (My mom had an ingrown thumbnail and her finger was filling up with puss, so my dad found a leech to suck it all out. It worked!)

Well, that just about sums up my Aidilfitri this year. How was yours? :)

To Both Bitches Back Home…

Kenit is pissed off. Hahahaha! Ernie and I were totally ROTFL!

Finally!

I graduated! WoOHoO! Finally! All that hard work finally paid off! WheeeEEE! Goodbye UPM! Thank you for everything! Real world, here I come! :)

A Most Productive Day :)

Today has been a most productive day because…

1. I managed to get my super lazy class, Form 4I, to behave AND participate in today’s lesson. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, did their work. I’m so proud of them. And myself too hehe.
2. I spent some quality time with a few students from another class of mine. Listened to them. Gave some advice (Hah! I’m qualified to give advice! I feel so old!). Had a nice chat. Even sang Miley Cyrus’ “The Climb” with them. I’m so fun :)
3. Gave up my seat on the LRT for a woman with a baby. Ended up standing with a heavy bag AND a laptop bag (yes, there was a laptop in the laptop bag) for a full 40 minutes the whole way to Gombak.
4. Spent some time with Bahasa Baku Man, who is actually starting to sound more local now. Should I call him Lawyer Dude?
5. FINALLY went to Kinokuniya and bought Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin AND The Prisoner of Zenda by Anthony Hope. Wheee~! More Mr.Darcy for me~!

I Love You Too :)

Evil Twitter!

NOOOOOOOOO~! I now have a Twitter account! Yeah… I caved. God, I’m so easy! Anyway, if you feel like following me there, here’s the link http://twitter.com/IraSolehan

My Love Character – The Dreamer

blodyn just took the "What is Your Love Character?" quiz and the result is The Dreamer.

You are addicted to the idea of love. As an individual you are seductive and magnetic. You easily attract others with your sexuality & charisma People want to be with you… people want YOU. In your mind you know exactly what perfect love is ...and desire nothing less …you deserve it. You hunger for sensuality and crave intimacy. You adore simple expressions of love …like a soft kiss on the forehead …or the touch of a loving finger tip on your lips. However most of your loving is played out in your head. You tend to over-think issues relating to love ...often misinterpreting other’s motives in the process. You are very inventive in finding ways for people to show you how they feel ...and at time your need for confirmation backfires on you. You are seeking your ideal vision of love ...and cannot easily accept your partners imperfections. You can be very demanding in your expectations and can quickly discard anyone who does not meet your high standards. As a result, your love life is active but not fulfilling ...your relationships tend to be short lived or shallow. You may in a long term relationship but your are secretly yearning for more.

NOTE: Whoa.. Weirdly accurate.. Creepy!

How People Get Deleted From My Facebook Friends List

I have a classmate who has somehow gotten herself into a frigging McDonald’s obsession. Maybe it’s for a contest or something. Anyway, it would have been okay except for the fact that it’s EFFING ANNOYING! She changes her facebook updates about 10 times a day with stupid McDonald’s “fun” facts as well as the tagline “Have you had your McValue meal today?” And she even has a frigging album filled with McDonald’s pictures.  This would have been alright with me except that it frigging spams my frigging friends updates page!!! So I commented on one of her annoying McDonald’s status updates telling her if she doesn’t stop with the McDonald’s obsession, I would delete her off my friends list. And you know what she did? She deleted my comment! I was like, okay, whatever. I went out, came back 4 hours later, and found my friends updates page SPAMMED with EVEN MORE stupid McDonald’s crap. So I did what any sane person would do. I deleted her off my friends list. BooYah!

Bad Sister? Me?

I went home last weekend to hang out with my sisters. That’s right. Hang out con mis dos hermanas. Anyhoo, since Kenit was going off to UIA the next day, I thought I’d take her and Ernie to The Castle for some shisha. Actually, it was mostly coz I haven’t had shisha in a while. Haha. Anyhoo, the three of us went, had some awesome Chicken Shawarma, and then ordered some awesome shisha. We were joined later by The Journalist and Yu-Yun. Definitely a girls' night out.

Anyhoo, when we got back around midnight, Kenit rushed upstairs and tutally PUKED! My mom was not happy. She was screaming about how I’m such a bad sister for taking my younger sister out for shisha and for getting her so sick that she was puking, and all this on the night before she was supposed to register as a new student at UIA. Yeah, I’m a bad sister because my sister had gas in her stomach. Go figure. Anyway, Ernie and I thought it was the funniest thing ever and we just laughed our asses off while Kenit was heaving upstairs. Here are some pics of that eventful night, sans the vomiting :P

 

 

 

My two lovely sisters, Kenit and Ernie. The one in blue was the one who puked :P

 

 

 

 

Enjoying an awesome CHICKEN SHAWARMA!!! *drools*

 

 

 

 

 

The almost always beautiful me :)

 

 

 

 

Surprise! Look who it is! It’s my long-lost adik angkat from my high school days, SHIMI!